I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
