At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
