I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
areolas are like halos for boobs.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
They took my balls.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Randomize