Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
