no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
why do cheetos always look like penises
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
