Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
