I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
