We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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