You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
