Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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