Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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