It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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