He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
