Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize