And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
