And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
