my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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