you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
