so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It's never too late to be topless.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
