the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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