new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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