with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
