dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize