she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
i think my cat just said my name.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize