So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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