she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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