seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Randomize
