Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you traded sex for a burrito?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
