Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
