Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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