Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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