Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize