i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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