Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
