Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Just pee around me
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize