Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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