If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
