what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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