Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
