he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
