Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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