How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize