i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
