She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
