we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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