I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
