those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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