I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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