he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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