i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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