I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
