fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
