Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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