worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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