More tranny stories later!
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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